One of the motherswiving robbers in mediæval caper movie Heist lets loose a flagonful of gut juice.

The Whingers were fully expecting to be able to review their own West End stage debuts in Fat Pig.

Having missed out on making their Broadway debuts in both Xanadu and the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee they leapt at the chance to secure on-stage seating at the new Neil LaBute play at the Trafalgar Studios.

Andrew had got himself into a right old tizzy of excitement. He had spent weeks planning his "performance", trying to pin down the nuances of his character (sadly elusive) and, most importantly, deciding what he should wear to draw most attention to himself. He eschewed Phil's offer of his favourite fashion item of the moment: a Sarah Jessica Parker style fascinator, instead settling for his old favourite "Ignore Me. I'm Just Reviewing Your Performance" t-shirt.

But their plans were cruelly dashed.

Those cunning people at the Trafalgar Studios had obviously got wind of the Whingers' plans for they were summarily stopped at the door and sent to the box office where a jolly woman explained that they had been "upgraded" from £25 to £45 seats. Had this been a long haul BA flight they might have been excited but Andrew was crushed.

Yes, the theatre had seemingly gone to the extraordinary length of reconfiguring the seating so that the Whingers' seats actually no longer existed.

As it happens one of their second row stalls seat proved to be excellent, but the one next to it had a very restricted view of the stage as it had the tallest-person-in-the-front-row sitting directly in front of it. To add to the general disgruntlement, several scenes took place sitting or lying on the floor of the stage so it was a pretty poor state of affairs. And this was in the sharply raked (but unforgiving) Trafalgar Studio 1 auditorium. Don't directors ever check sightlines?

The only silver lining was that the remaining on-stage seats weren't really on stage at all, just at the side.

Anyhoo what of the play? Well, it stars a group of people off the telly ("the country's hottest actor-comedians" according to the publicity).

Phil - who embraces such modern modes of entertainment - knew a couple of them but Andrew who famously (and rather loftily) claims not to "do telly" was a bit vague. But the theatre was packed out, so the clever producers' plan had obviously worked. Judging by the difficulty many of the audience had in matching the letters and numbers on their tickets to the seats, these people were not - in the main - regular theatre-goers eager to catch the latest LaBute.

The story: Tom (Robert Webb as in Mitchell & Webb) meets Helen (Ella Smith) at lunch. They get on well and start dating. But Helen is the titular Fat Pig and Tom finds himself trying to conceal the burgeoning relationship from his work colleagues - mischievous plonker Carter (Kris Marshall) and jilted Jeannie (Joanna Page).

When they eventually find out, the viciousness of office jokes about Helen's size take a typically LaButian turn. Think watered-down In the Company of Men replacing deafness with obesity.

The Whingers could identify with this. They are used to having insults thrown as them (Fram has produced the best of recent times: "technically closer to wanking than whinging") and, indeed, throwing them at each other.

The opening scene is one of the funniest of the play, Webb, of course, has good comedy tics and timing. Smith is superb too and easily the most convincingly American English person on the London stage at the moment.

So convincing in fact that as the Whingers were collared by her in the pub afterwards another punter (who the Whingers deftly swatted away) came up to ask her if she really was from the States.

Anyway, as well as being very funny, Fat Pig is utterly engaging and even the cold hearts of the Whingers were touched by this tale of the tribulations of love, of how difficult honesty can be and of third eyes (Not literally, obviously. But that might make quite a good play too).

There were only a couple of whinges. Andrew spent each scene change with his fingers in his ears to shut out the very over-loud rock music, and Phil was unconvinced by the final beach scene in which Webb was wearing a pair of Next underpants beneath his shorts. Does Next have a presence in the US? Phil made a mental note to check but never got round to it.

Footnote 1: In Which The West End Turns The Corner

A few weeks ago the Whingers received one of their oddest requests to date: to recommend two musicals and two plays for a visiting diplomatic dignitary (who we have been asked not to name in order not to risk starting some terrible international incident). We managed to come up with Hairspray and Major Barbara and then got a bit stuck.

While drumming up a second musical recommendation might still be a bit of an effort (Marguerite at a push), this week has increased the list of recommended plays threefold: The Pitmen Painters and now Fat Pig.

The Whingers are clearly on a roll. What could possibly go wrong now?

Footnote 2: Interesting names found in programmes #2

Following on from the wonderfully named wardrobe mistress Traipsy Drake in God of Carnage the Whingers were beguiled to see that Fat Pig's Associate Director is Cat Totty.

I know they were 'only Chinese' but surely they rate above the sound of one Mandelson clapping.

Sixty-six deaths.  Just another example of how tragedies in Eastern Europe, Asia, Africa, South America and especially the Middle East go unreported.  I imagine that Ginger Spice's reading her new book for children in a school will be amply reported, though.

It sucks, verily.

O que se pode acontecer em poucas horas? Ainda mais prestando uma última homenagem ao finado pai? Nesse velório, acontece lances inusitados. E para nós, divertidíssimos!

Um dos dois filhos, casado, que mora na casa paterna cuida dos últimos preparativos. Para que saia tudo a tempo e a hora. E sua esposa, a lembrar-lhe que precisa fazer o depósito do novo apartamento. Eis que o corpo chega na casa e... E tem início as situações que não estavam nos planos dele para o funeral do pai.

O outro irmão, um escritor famoso, que mora em Nova Iorque. Chega. Esse, bem extrovertido. Mas recusa a dizer as últimas palavras ao pai. Passando a vez para o irmão. O que gera reações dos convidados.

No caminho para o funeral... um para pegar o velho tio. Outra, que vai buscar o irmão para o velório do tio. Mas o namorado, nervoso... Bem, não é um calmante que ele ingeriu na casa do cunhado.

Não parando por aí, um desconhecido chega exigindo dinheiro para não revelar um segredo do falecido. E está armado o circo. Ops! Irmãos e primos na tentativa de encontrar uma saída... acabam armando mais confusão.

Pessoal! O filme é muito engraçado! Os atores são ótimos! O roteiro é dez! Contar mais, é tirar de vocês a diversão. Eu adorei!

Por: Valéria Miguez.

Morte no Funeral (Death at a Funeral). 2007. Inglaterra. Direção: Frank Oz. Elenco: Mathew Macfadyen, Rupert Graves, Keeley Hawes, Andy Nyman, Ewen Bremner, Daisy Donovan, Alan Tudyk, Jane Asher, Kris Marshall, Peter Vaughan, Thomas Wheatley, Peter Egan, Peter Dinklage. Gênero: Comédia. Duração: 90. Classificação: 14 anos.

Gran Bretaña, nación conocida por su monarquía, su liga de fútbol, el Yorkshire Pudding y sus mujeres feas, desde hace algunos años es también conocida como el país de las comedias inteligentes, caracterizadas por su humor negro. "The Office", la exitosa serie de TV que se centra en un grupo de desadaptados oficinistas, es prueba de ello, además de reconocidas películas como Shaun of the Dead o Hot Fuzz. Pues bien, Death at a Funeral está un escalón más abajo en inteligencia, sin embargo, cumple de muy buena manera con presentarnos una entretenida e hilarante historia que, por donde se la mire, tiene escrito Made in Britain.

Pocas cosas deben ser más terribles que la muerte de uno de tus padres. Para Daniel (Matthew Macfadyen) la situación, aunque emocionalmente dura, ha resultado ser una prueba de caracter y templanza, sin embargo, el día del funeral de su padre no empieza bien cuando, al abrir el ataúd, se da cuenta que el cuerpo que está adentro no corresponde al de su progenitor. A medida que los minutos pasan y los familiares de Daniel comienzan a aparecer, se nos presenta una batería de personajes, cada uno con graves problemas personales o de socialización, que van transformando la casa de Daniel en un polvorín a punto de estallar. La tensión, en esta disfuncional familia inglesa, crece exponencialmente cuando hace su aparición Robert (Rupert Graves), el exitoso hermano escritor de Daniel, que a su vez es un escritor en potencia y reprimido viviendo bajo la oscura sombra de su hermano. En este marco es que el funeral toma el rumbo directo al absurdo, cuando llega Peter (Peter Dinklage) un extraño personaje que afirma que el difunto ocultaba un oscuro secreto. Obligados a unir fuerzas Daniel y Robert se encuentran entre la espada y la pared, y se ven obligados a tomar drásticas medidas para evitar el caos total el día del entierro de su padre.

Frank Oz dirige esta entretenida, aunque corta, película en que el absurdo y las situaciones imposibles en los momentos más inoportunos son el motor de la historia. Aunque el humor está presente en toda la película, los personajes principales no logran transmitir ese humor negro que se requería de personajes que deben parecer serios, es por eso que todo el peso del humor recae en un puñado de actores secundarios que logran apropiarse de la película y darnos escenas llenas de chistes fáciles, pero efectivos. Mención aparte a la notable actuación de Peter Dinklage, lejos lo mejor de la cinta y cuya escena más loca (en la cual también participan Peter Vaughan, Andy Nyman y Kris Marshall) hará que te dobles de la risa. Por otro lado Martha (Daisy Donovan), polola de Simon (Alan Tudyk), demuestra ser la más fuerte de toda la familia, mientras que Jane (Keeley Hawes) esposa de Daniel, se muestra oprimida aunque claramente con un alto potencial volatil.

Death at a Funeral (conocida en España como "Un Funeral de Muerte" y en Chile como "Una Muerte en el Funeral") está lejos de ser la mejor comedia británica, pero por lo menos cumple con su rol de entretener y hacer reír. Vale la pena verla.

TRAILER

FICHA TÉCNICA
Nombre: Death at a Funeral
Año: 2007
Duración: 90 minutos
Dirigida por: Frank Oz
Escrita por: Dean Craig
Protagonizada por: Matthew Macfadyen, Keeley Hawes, Andy Nyman, Ewen Bremner, Daisy Donovan, Alan Tudyk, Jane Asher, Kris Marshall, Rupert Graves, Peter Vaughan y Peter Dinklage
Producida por: Sidney Kimmel Entertainment

Ja skończyłem oglądoczytać Death Note - i stwierdzam, że zdecydowanie bardziej wolałem część pierwszą, aż do śmierci L-a, bo Near i Mello mnie nie przekonali. Niemniej jednak muszę powiedzieć, że mangę czyta się miło, a anime - ogląda. Mimo tego, że Raito w drugiej części to tylko cień tego z pierwszej, nadal pozostaje on moim ulubionym bohaterem Notesu Śmierci. W ogóle dowiedziałem się, że AXN na swoim kanale SciFi planuje pokazanie tego anime! Szkoda, że SciFi nie mam, ale i tak miło wiedzieć, że anime trafia w końcu również i do polskich telepaczydłowców (nawet jeżeli jako nazwę przyjmuje się Notatnik Śmierci).

Obecnie mam kilka możliwości, co robić dalej. Mam w postaci anime Ergo Proxy oraz Serial Experiments Lain, a jako mangę - Monstera i MPD Psycho. Zobaczymy na co się ostatecznie zdecyduję (chyba SEL, bo to miałem zamiar obejrzeć już od baaaardzo dawna).

Wczoraj byłem po wpis z pejcza, co czyni moją sesję prawie zamkniętą - oprócz przeklętych metod, ale z nimi to zawsze problem. Przynajmniej mam jeszcze szansę... Przy okazji Szank zaproponował squasha, więc po odebraniu wpisów pojechaliśmy na Czyżyny zagrać przez godzinę. Bałem się, że będę dzisiaj totalnie nie do życia, ale wygląda na to, że jak na razie nic mi nie jest... Teraz tylko trzeba zacząć regularnie grać i utrzymywać kondycję.

Siostra, a więc i ja także, ostatnio zaczęła grać w Simsy 2... Jak pomyślę, ile dodatków do tego jest, to robi mi się słabo... Przecież tego koło 12 wyszło... Ale co tam, poinstalowane wszystko, teraz tylko testować =] W sumie miło od czasu do czasu pozdobywać jakieś punkty umiejętności czy inne gwiazdki - taka chwila relaksu. Może stworzę sobie Raito i Misę? Chociaż Misa taka stara... Chociaż jutro będą 3 lata zanim umrze - może wypadałoby to jakoś uczcić?

Ponieważ dwa dni temu rano strasznie mi się nudziło, napisałem na szybko 4shared account refreshera. Mimo strasznej nazwy, dość przydatna rzecz dla każdego, kto korzysta z 4shared, a czasami zapomina się zalogować. Przy okazji wędrówek po 4shared, trafiłem na piękne wideo pokazujące jak zrobić helisę. Wydaje się proste, więc pewnie sprobuję taką sobie zrobić...

Oglądałem sobie swoje stare archiwum ważnych wiadomości i znalazłem kilka ciekawych obrazków. Na początek trochę kredek: #1, #2 & #3. Z łezką człowiek wspomina te czasy (i te 60 zł wydanych na bieliznę :P). I jeszcze galeria zdjęć z Lublina (ferie 2006) - jakość taka a nie inna, bo robione starym analogiem, do tego jeszcze mój skaner... Ale lepsze takie niż żadne :P

Mimo, że wiem, iż ta osoba nie czyta mojego bloga, chciałbym ją przeprosić za moje wczorajsze słowa - to było zupełnie niepotrzebne. Mam nadzieję, że nie wpłyną one na nasze wzajemne kontakty, które przecież do tej pory były naprawdę niezłe. Przepraszam.

Warto również wspomnieć o filmie, który ostatnio obejrzałem - Volkodava. Może i niektóre sceny nie były napakowane aż takimi efektami specjalnymi jak produkcje amerykańskie, ale mimo wszystko uważam, że wyszła całkiem miła baśń rosyjska, w której aktorzy nie mieli pięknie naoliwionej skóry jak Amerykanie... Jednym słowem - oglądało się przyjemnie. Taka odmiana po wszystkich fantasy amerykańskich. Rodzicom zaserwowałem Zgon na pogrzebie - bo w końcu komedia jest naprawdę zabawna. Zresztą, miałem rację, o czym przekonałem się słysząc ich śmiech. Przy okazji stwierdziłem, że chciałbym mieć fryzurę jak Kris Marshall, który w Zgonie grał Troya. Może nie do końca wyraźnie, ale dzięki tej fotce może zrozumiecie. Albo obejrzyjcie po prostu film :P

A jeżeli już o filmach, to na zakończenie galeria Sarah Roemer (która grała między innymi w Disturbii). Mam nadzieję, że te parę fotek się spodoba - ona jest naprawdę śliczna!

No, to na tyle dzisiejszego chaosu ;)

The scenario is not exactly novel either. When the patriarch of an upper-middle class family expires, his two warring sons (Macfadyen and Graves) return to the family home for the funeral and wake. Various cousins, in-laws and friends are also present including some mystery figures whose identities or relationships with the deceased are not exactly clear, while the addition of illicit drugs further clouds proceedings. Things should all be shockingly funny, instead the comic timing is so off, the audience may well feel they are waiting a lifetime for the punchline to arrive. Each ‘humorous’ scene is set up only to fall flat on its face and as the film lurches into farce all involved have the expression of terrified bunnies just waiting for the nightmare to end. The best way you can avoid experiencing this bad acid trip of a so-called comedy is not to attend in the first place – a quick, unmourned death away from the limelight is the most it can hope for.     Dee Pilgrim

Ahahaha - his Dad's embarrassing goal celebration. Honestly, how charming, the display of affection between son and dad enjoying the ‘footie’…

Just to take you through this cradle of filth, the advert commences with Dad and his lanky twat of a son who was the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family (I’ve seen him being ‘craaazzzy’ on it prior to turning the TV off/over with my forehead) watching a football match on the telly.

But let's not run away with ourselves, let's take a step back. Sadly this series of BT adverts has been running like a soap opera for months, the premise is that the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family has wound up shacked up with a bird who has two teenage kids. FROM A PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIP. ITZ SEW MODERNED.

So, there they are watching telly, Dad, son (the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family) AND, we notice, the teenage son of the bird that the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family is currently being ‘craaazzzy’ with. (We know he’s ‘craaazzzy’ because he turns his shirt collar up and his hair is a little ruffled. WILD).

During the match on the telly the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family looks over at his dad in a manner that I presume the BT Producers intended to be portrayed as affectionate, though in reality it looks more like his sizing him up for a raping. We are then treated to a flashback, Dad and son (a younger version of the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family) on the terraces watching a match.

Dad too has been made up to look younger by plastering a huge black wig over his beach ball sized head and having his glasses changed for a pair of jam jar bottoms. He resembles a cross between a henchmen of The Krays and the bloke who is referred to as a ‘twisted old prune’ in Spinal Tap.

During the nostalgia scene the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family reminisces about the footie with Dad, dodgy meat pie at half time (I notice he doesn’t then go on to reminisce about being sick on his lap on the journey home, a temperature of 103° and vicious diarrhoea for the following week which loses him a week of school and over a stone in weight) and Dad's embarrassing goal celebrations, or in my opinion, paydirt.

Said ‘celebration’ consists of grabbing one's child by the head and, bafflingly, pouting ones lips prior to thrusting ones face into the victims hair and vigorously shaking ones head from side-to-side. Two things here, firstly its clear that this was the best the ad agency could muster when given the brief for an ‘embarrassing goal celebration’, it’s a fucking shit one, unbelievable actually, secondly, if it was remotely believable the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family should’ve been taken into care.

We then cut back to the present day just as ‘United’ have scored. Christ bled, dad jumps up and performs his embarrassing goal celebration on the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family, and attempts to perform the same manoeuvre on the teenage son of the bird that the ‘craaazzzy’ one in My Family is currently being ‘craaazzzy’ with.

The thing about these fucking BT adverts is that I’ve no idea what the fuck they’re trying to actually sell me. I think its phones, and I only think that because they’re BT adverts. Why on earth then is the catalyst for the selling of phones process a turdy little soap seen predominantly through the eyes of some cunt getting used to his ready-made family?

Oh, great idea for the Honda Civic, a pixie dressed as a Beefeater throwing bathroom taps at a copy of Ian McEwan's Atonement. I don’t know about you but that screams Four-cylinder 1590cc engine, with 108bhp @ 5600rpm and 111 lb ft @ 4300rpm Torque, five-speed manual, front-wheel drive with (front) MacPherson struts (rear) multilink suspension to me.

• Channel 4 is under mounting pressure not to broadcast a graphic documentary about the death of Diana, Princess of Wales.
• My Family's Kris Marshall is to star in a new ITV comedy about the world of pedigree dog shows.
• Blue Peter is to be cut from three shows a week to two.
• Following the success of Any Dream Will Do, Graham Norton is being lined up to front a TV talent search for a wannabe to play the John Travolta role in a new stage version of Saturday Night Fever.
• A new Dutch reality TV show will see a terminally ill woman select one of three contestants to receive her kidneys when she dies.
• He may have recently turned 40, but Gordon Ramsay hasn't mellowed one bit. Check out this fab trailer for the latest series of Hell's Kitchen USA, which begins in America next Monday.

TV programme sponsorship has come a long way in the last few years. It wasn't that long ago that it was only the cash-strapped ITV who were willingly auctioning off their most popular programmes to appropriately twinned products, but now every commercial channel under the sun is doing it.

Channel 4 has become the master of this process, turning overnight from a liberal, non-mainstream channel into the programming equivilent of a formula one race car. Each of its shows are delicately hawked, comfortably snuggling against products and giving both the advertiser and the viewer the impression of actually being 'involved' with the show.

For a while these were just short loops, the same footage of a chocolate high-street or bubble of blue air would appear before and after each ad break, but quickly these clips became tedious and infuriating - as anyone who remembers the horrific O2 logofication of Big Brother will testify. Soon they evolved into the short dramatic or sketch moments you see today - little glimpses of a storyline, of a situation - something which seeks to entertain and lightly amuse. Far from being satisfied with mere association, the products are now requesting an emotional involvement in them - as if to say, "hey, we know you're enjoying Deal or No Deal but we thought we'd give you this second story about a woman who's lost her wedding ring down the plughole as well. For free! Aren't BT nice for boosting the dramatic appeal of this show?"

At 3.30 on any weekday Channel 4 has the same run of programmes; Countdown, Deal or No Deal, the Paul O'Grady Show, the Simpsons and finally Hollyoaks. Three and a half hours of pretty fair old lady / housewife / student / teenager programming. Let's look at who sponsors each show, and how...

3.30 - Countdown (Sponsored by the Digital Switchover). These ones are actually quite sweet as a cute-but-not-entirely- -unSMASH-like robot helps an old lady with the Countdown clues. It's well done, the robot is really adorable and it's raising the issue with the demographic who'll probably struggle the most. It is a little low on actual information, seemingly happy to imply that all people over 60 will receive a cute robot who'll help them with word puzzles, instead of gently saying "you need to buy a new TV" but there's still three more years to go so I guess this is just the start of the campaign.

4.15 - Deal or No Deal (Sponsored by BT). Like a modern day Pinter play, these fleeting vignettes revolve around the wife and children from the proper BT adverts and deal with the minutiae of family life, and how each potential crisis can be solved with the phone book. What is particulary noticeable about these 'moments' is the absence of My Family buffoon Kris Marshall, and I'd like to debate three possible reasons for this. Those of you not prone to semi-conspiratory media analysis may want to skip to the next section which is far funnier and has several gay jokes.

Reasons for Kris Marshalls Absence in the Deal Or No Deal Viral Ads

1. They couldn't afford him. This is most likely as contracts and repeat fees often restrict the use of the 'star' and the wife and children will come much cheaper.
2. Cross-market advertising. Despite using the same characters and situations as the normal TV adverts, it is important for the 'sponsored by' stings to have subtle differences. By omiting the star of the adverts they are noting the distinction between a hard sell and a generous sponsorship
3. It's all about your gender. Most working husbands won't be home before the end of the show, and since the advert represents a normal (but surprisingly youthful) mother with a teenage child, why would her husband be home? Thus each sting involves a domestic chore or parental decision and not a matter of household importance. It's a subtle point, but by not using Kris Marshall they are attempting to win confidence with the majority of their demographic by more directly representing their lives... sponsorship is not about directly selling a product, it's about breeding familiarity and association with the audiences life.

5.00 - The Paul O'Grady Show (Sponsored by Schwartz). I don't know about Paul O'Grady's sexual orientation. He makes no allusions to either hetero or homo, and he is a mid-level kind of camp which is somewhere between screaming queer (Kenneth Williams) and uncomfortable impression (Duncan Norville). One possible reason for this is that the 'sponsored by' stings that straddle his show are so outrageously gay that anything that exists between them is subject to a relative equation which far exceeds normal levels of gay.

They are very short 'slices' of conversation that occur around various kitchens across the country, cut to close ups of hands preparing food and using Schwartz products. The dialogue has clearly been written / recycled from a radio advert, where everything has to be spelt out in a  v e r y  c l e ar  w a y  as it resembles no real life conversation in any way.

My favourite one is between two men, somewhere in a sunny kitchen... one is making breakfast and the other enters and expresses his amazement at this activity. "Hang on" he says "you never make breakfast", and gently it transpires that the breakfast is being made for an overnight guest. When pressed for details the man simply says "ah ah ah ah, a true gentleman never tells" and both men relax into comfortable, friendly giggles. It's amazing.

Every line of dialogue, every intonation of emotion is completely wrong. The laugh at the end implys a certain familiarity with the situation, but the genuine shock at the realisation suggests a new experience. The clear and polite language is too enthusiastic, and the reaction to the news of a sordid evening is wholly perceived as a positive thing. The men are also so very clearly gay; this would be fine were it not for the fact they're not meant to be. In the advertising world the idea of a flatmate chiding another for a one night stand is wholly acceptable in heterosexual terms, but wholly unacceptable in a homosexual situation. Thus only one conclusion can be reached; they're really badly made adverts.

6.00 - The Simpsons (no sponsor)

6.25 - Hollyoaks (Sponsored by Wrigleys Gum). The Hollyoaks spots are another attempt to have a semi-coherent storyline running throughout the adverts. A teenage cast go through the various ups and downs of adolescence, accompanied by the ever-present litter of Britain, Wrigleys.

Looking nothing like any teenagers I've ever met, and certainly not like the hip young things they're meant to represent, these kids meet girls, steal cars and watch TV but at all times behave like the home-schooled offspring of Enid Blyton. A Gorgeous Chick hits on a Chav Nerd and plays him at pool for chewing gum, a hot older sister bribes a youth with gum to leave her alone with her boyfriend, the said Chav Nerd impresses the Gorgeous Chick with his dashboard stash of gum...

If this were at all representative of today's youth then the kids would play pool for clothes, the older sister would be pregnant already and the Gorgeous Chick would be finger-fucked in the car instead of offered mints. Even by Hollyoaks standards this is piss-poor acting and a bad portrayal of the nation's youth. If it's meant to be hip then it's woeful, if it's meant to be ironic it's even worse.

Coming Soon:
BAE sponsors Channel 4 News and Loans4You get behind Glitterball.